#army men
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thatkindagirl2 · 1 year ago
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doodlesdreaming · 9 months ago
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“A man after my own heart.”
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dolletecoquett · 7 months ago
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found-in-retro-game-mags · 11 months ago
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Army Men 3D
"Just like the real army. Except for the syphilis." (PSM #10, June 1998)
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retrocgads · 4 months ago
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UK 1998
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militarymenrbomb · 3 months ago
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aimusclegods · 8 months ago
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solitudeintheheart · 1 year ago
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PARTNER <18+>
PART ONE
|König x F!Reader|(2.1k words)
CW: slight violence
CONTEXT: You were never one to work with other people. Not after what happened to you two years ago. But when you get Colonel König as your assigned partner for your next mission, you wonder if you’ll be able to get through it without a pounding headache. Or heartache.
“What a nuisance,” You muttered under your breath after your superiors had assigned you a partner for your next mission. You never needed a partner; you were confident enough in your skills to proudly say that, but the fact that your partner felt more like a babysitter bothered you. You were to spend the next four days with the notorious Colonel König, pretending to be new recruits for an enemy drug lord’s personal unit. You weren’t sure about the amount of strings your higher-ups had to pull just to give you another identity, but they must have been planning this mission for a while.
The fact that you were both quiet didn’t really help either, since it meant for an awkward mission filled with possible miscommunication. This was why you preferred to work solo. There was no one to keep watch over, and you didn’t have to worry about someone ruining the plan.
You sat down on the floor in the armory, cleaning your weapons with a wet rag to ensure they stayed in their best condition while you were gone. König put all of his stuff back into his locker before turning to look at you. He stared, and at some point you swore he looked as though he was going to say something, but chose not to. You weren’t interested in initiating the conversation though. Either he was the one who spoke to you first, or you both would go through this whole mission not speaking at all. He finally opened his mouth.
“I look forward to working with you,” He sounded like a robot reading off a script: tense and rehearsed. You decided to finally look up at him, only giving him a small nod before looking back down at your weapons.
“I hope this silence won’t last our entire mission, Y/N.”
You looked up at him once again, this time a little surprised that he wasn’t taking your lack of responses as a sign that you weren’t interested in making friendships.
“I apologize.” A short response, maybe then he will get the hint.
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You both made your way to the location given by the enemy unit’s captain, the car ride there was equally as quiet as it had been before you were even assigned to the mission. Once there, the two of you got out of the car and grabbed your bags, making your way to the entrance and being checked for any weapons on your person. The both of you were allowed inside, and you were guided by someone to the soldier’s quarters; everyone had their individual room that included a bed, nightstand, a wardrobe, and a bathroom. When you were taken to your room, you set your backpack inside and opened it, taking out all the clothes you brought and hanging them up inside the wardrobe. The door was knocked on, another soldier looked at you and handed you a mask, not speaking a word. You knew that your mission had just begun.
Another soldier led the way to where all the new recruits were standing, and you caught a glimpse of König not wearing the mask that covered his whole face. He instead wore the same mask everyone, including you, had on. It was a black mask that covered the head and the lower portion of his face. You stood behind someone; everyone was put into rows of six. The unit captain made his way to the front of the group, and you were all prompted to salute. He stood with his hands behind his back, inspecting everyone as if he was trying to pick out the best fruit in the bunch.
“Now, you’re all here because you want easy money. Maybe you were some bum pickpocketing people on the street, or a gang member who thought they were the toughest in their neighborhood. Well let me tell you now,” He pointed his finger to everyone, “None of that matters here. Here, someone will always be bigger than you, badder than you. You are a disposable human for us to use. That is what you signed up for in return for giving you a clean slate.” He brought his hand back down and behind his back. “I am Captain Wyatt Landor, and I will be in charge of Unit Forty-Six, which is you guys. Your purpose is to defend Richard Toplin, the leader of the Primrose Drug Group. You will answer to his demands, and you will lay your life down for him. Anyone who puts him in danger will be executed in the slowest way possible. There is no backing out now.” Captain Landor had an ugly smirk on his grin. He seemed like the kind of man who relished in seeing the suffering of other people. Just the thought of it brought chills.
“But before you can start, you’ll have to be trained. For how long? Two days. That is all you get, and if you don’t pass our qualifications by then, you’ll be forced to work for us in
different ways.” He clapped his hands together. “Let’s get started, shall we?” The unit was told to follow the captain to a training room where a sparring competition would take place. It was supposedly an event to get a good idea on who had actual combat skills and who didn’t, but you only thought of it as an unnecessary bother. Patience is key though, right?
You were paired up with the person who stood next to you and you stepped into the ring. There was no protective gear, not even a limit on how hard you could hit the other person. It was perfect. Two other pairs were placed into the other two rings, König was a part of one. A bell rang, indicating the match had started.
Your poor partner was a man not much taller than you. He was skinny and you could tell he relied on weapons rather than his bare hands. This should be easy. You didn’t let a single second pass by after the bell rang when you punched the man in the ribs and then his chin, he fell to the ground almost immediately. Gasps came from the crowd watching and waiting for their turn, and when you looked at the spectators, you let out an evil smile. The next person who would fight against you had a look of fear, and they had to be forced into the ring.
“I don’t bite,” You said quietly, and once the bell rang, you kicked their feet and dropped them to the ground. They tried to crawl away, but you grabbed their legs in time and dragged them closer to you before laying on top of them and trapping all of their limbs. You wrapped an arm around their neck and held it back so they were slowly running out of breath, and they tapped out. You didn’t let go of them just yet though, no, you wanted to see this scum of a human panic just a little more. You wondered what their crimes were; thievery, battery, or murder? Maybe you could ask and add a few more seconds depending on the severity.
“Y/N!” You heard a familiar voice call out to you and you looked at the last ring to your left. König stood up while his opponent was unconscious on the floor. He looked at you as you didn’t let go of the person who was on the brink of passing out. “Can’t you see they tapped out?” You looked at him and scowled before letting go of the person from your grasp. Their face fell onto the floor and wheezed, you stood up and looked at the next person in line.
What you didn’t realize was that Captain Landor was looking at you and König with amusement. “Y/N, huh? What about you big guy, what’s your name?” He waited for König’s response.
“König, sir.” He stood up straight and kept his arms at his sides, it had been a while since he had to treat someone else with such respect.
“Do you two know each other?” He rubbed a hand on his beard and walked closer to get a better look. He motioned his finger for the two of you to get out of the rings.
“Yes we do, sir. We were both bodyguards for the same celebrity until we injured a civilian a little too much. He didn’t want to deal with the repercussions and had us fired.” You answered his question in fear that König didn’t remember the cover story.
“Ah, I do remember seeing two files that had that background,” He looked down and back up. “Well from what I’ve seen, I think you two are perfectly capable when it comes to combat. You guys can go on ahead and rest for the day. I worry that you both may find this competition tedious.” He smiled, and you actually liked the guy for a split second. He granted your wish to get over with the mission faster.
It was a quiet walk back to your rooms; It would be risky to talk about the plan in enemy territory. What if there were cameras or bugs? You didn’t want to stress out about death just yet, it was still too early.
You walked back to your room and turned around when you heard König’s steps behind you.
“Is there something you need, König?” You asked with your hand on the doorknob.
“Just because we are new here, doesn’t mean we should be so uptight. We are friends after all.” You knew what he meant. He was trying to go inside your room to talk about the plan without mentioning it directly.
“You’re right, friend. How could I ever think the opposite?” You opened the door and pushed it wide open with a smile. Your hand gestured to him to go inside, and when he finally walked in, your smile faded and you shut the door.
You took off your mask and let out a long sigh, of course König didn’t take off his.
“I heard from some of the new recruits that tomorrow there will be weapons training. It’s supposed to last from the morning to evening as a way to really eliminate the weak bunch.”
You chuckled, reminiscing of when you were a new recruit at Kortac.
“Nothing that we can’t handle,” You threw yourself on the bed and laid down, your back against the stiff, uncomfortable material. “What else did you hear?”
“The day after tomorrow, we are to leave for Italy. Apparently Mr. Toplin needs his personal unit to protect him while he meets in a casino with businessmen. Then on the last day of our mission, we will kill him during one of his parties. Pretty simple, ja?”
“Hah, this almost seems too easy.” You sighed. “Well if that’s all you wanted to talk about, I’d appreciate it if you left my room. I like my alone time.” You turned your head to look at him, he didn’t budge just yet.
“Well?”
“What’s your deal with always wanting to work solo?”
Well that was an out-of-nowhere question. Normally you’d assume people would make sure not to intrude in your personal matters, but it seems as if König was trying to get comfortable with you.
“You may be my superior, Colonel, but I don’t like it when people intrude. What will it benefit you to know the answer to that question?” You sat up on the bed, your hands propped you up as you leaned back.
“If I am to spend the next four days with you, I might as well get to know you,”
“It’s only four days. You won’t have to interact with me after that.”
“How will you even try to pretend we are strangers after this-“
“König-”
“Y/N.”
He looked at you with soft eyes. You hated when people looked at you like that, it almost seemed like he pitied you. Maybe he was piecing it together and felt sympathy for whatever bad experience you had in your past, and you loathed it.
“Partners are dead-weight, Colonel. Someone like you should know that better than anyone, don’t you think?” You glared at him, and his neutral face annoyed you even more.
“Someone like me should know that you can’t save everyone, not even your own teammates, Y/N. Do not underestimate your experience, I’ve heard good things about you.”
“I didn’t ask you to flatter me,”
“No one ever does, but that won’t stop people from receiving a simple compliment. Just accept it already.” He walked over to the door and opened it. His head turned to look at you one last time before closing the door behind him.
“Prick.”
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huntthemouse · 3 months ago
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Plastic Army Man Mickey
232/365 #hunt the mouse
I feel like this has to be an American-only thing, because what other country would sell small miniature men with guns in the cheapest possible way where often the sprue mark is still visible?
I am making 365 new versions of Mickey Mouse for the public domain and releasing them under public domain all year long.
You can join the initiative to #hunt the mouse or suggest a theme yourself via my ask box.
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redjones2004 · 3 months ago
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Now I have fantasies with army men! They are so strong and hot! I'm literally rubbing myself thinking of how brave they are! They deserve a reward, right? Or... a slave (I volunteer đŸ™‹â€â™€ïž)
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holysaintscathedral · 2 years ago
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ryunumber · 1 year ago
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How about Sarge from the Army Men games? (not to be confused with Sarge from Toy Story)
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Sarge does not have a Ryu Number.
(clarification below)
The only potential connection I could identify is that in the Portal Runner spinoff, Vikki helps save the most cartoon wizard-ass wizard that I've seen referred to as Merlin by multiple people in multiple places, but I'm not sure any official material actually identifies him as such.
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Even granting that this is a Merlin, I don't there's enough for me to say that it's the Merlin of Arthurian legend, given the generic medieval toy setting and lack of supporting cast members. I mean, you save him from trouble on a chessboard.
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Now technically, Merlin himself predates Arthurian legend so he ostensibly can be identified without those trappings, so I guess if you really wanted to, you could, but I don't know man,
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this doesn't scan quite right to me.
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dolletecoquett · 8 months ago
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he's so 🎀
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n64retro · 2 years ago
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Army Men Sarge's Heroes (3DO, 1999). Gifs by Gfycat and N64th Street.
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zaccosnacco · 9 months ago
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Look who I finished
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With the help of this guy
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Heres some wip pictures
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militarymenrbomb · 3 months ago
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